I mentioned in my last post that it is important to intentionally look back and remember. Why is this so important? Simply put, it is very healthy to know where you are and where you want to go.
While in some cases it may be a bit uncomfortable or even somewhat discouraging to remember, it is the only way that you can make needed changes and move forward.
The flip side is that it is also encouraging. There are blessings and changes that sometimes go unnoticed. This is just as dangerous. God has blessed us above and beyond what we could ask or think. The Bible is chalk full of instances where God reminds His children to remember. Remembering God's faithfulness in the past is the surest way of not falling into despondency over trials today.
We chose to remember by making an evening out of it. I already told you that I put slips of paper with questions in a jar and we pulled them out and talked about that particular question and answer. This was both fun and serious and not only caused us to be once again reminded of God's faithfulness to us, but also helped us evaluate where we need to set goals to improve in this new year.
I will share with you some of the questions that we used to get our minds rolling. This is most certainly not an exhaustive list and we had more than I am including, but it will hopefully get your minds turning so that you can come up with your own list. So pull out a notebook jot down your thoughts as you intentionally look back on this past year.
1) What was one way I excelled as a spouse this year?
2) What was my biggest challenge in being a good spouse this year?
Use these questions to evaluate every relationship you have: Parent/Child/Employee/Employer/Neighbor/Church Member/Friend, etc.
(Special Note: The answer to the biggest challenge might be a good jumping off point for your goals for this new year!)
3) What is one thing I learned this year?
4) What one major goal did we accomplish this year?
5) What was my favorite book I read this year?
6) What are three direct answers to prayer this year?
(If you can't answer this question it might be that you have failed to ask God for answers. Or you might be so consumed with the answer coming in a specific way that you haven't even noticed the answer has been given just in a different way than you anticipated. I highly encourage you to ask and let your faith be strengthened as you see God answer your prayers.)
7) What was my biggest time waster this year? (All I'll say is,
ouch!)
8) What was our favorite family outing?
9) What is one funny moment that stands out?
10) What was Stefan/Olivia/Silas' biggest achievement this year? (Be sure and evaluate your children as individuals and not as a collective whole!)
11) What was one life changing event this year? (We had a lot! Baby, out-of-state move, seminary!)
12) What is one way I grew spiritually this year?
13) What is one way I grew intellectually this year?
14) What is one RAOK (Random Act Of Kindness) someone showed to you that you remember?
(Don't underestimate the value of a RAOK. My answer to this was a kind man helping me out with my grocery cart when I was struggling with car seat, groceries, children, and cart. It was a simple act of kindness, but these things are vastly being lost in our society. We try to be intentional about looking outside of ourselves to the needs of others around us. We want to do better about this and do better about teaching our kids to do this as well and these questions help!)
15) What is one RAOK I did for someone else?
I could go on, but I'll stop here. Hopefully this is enough to get you all going. Throw in some fun, tailored-to-your family questions and you have a great jumping off point to spend an evening remembering. It will strengthen your faith in God, it will help you evaluate where changes need to be made, and it will remind you of all the wonderful things God has given you.
For us, what always follows the night of remembering is a set aside time to set new goals. We have already been talking a lot about it, but our official goal setting time is coming this weekend. My sister is coming to babysit, and Brian and I are looking forward to some time alone to do just that!
This is certainly not a typical post for me, but I thought some of you might find it helpful so I thought I would share!